Yes, you read that right. This blog is all about TTC & Sperm!
We gotta talk about these special little swimmers, because if you are queer person who is trying to conceive and need sperm from a third party, it’s one the of biggest decisions you are gonna make!
Let’s talk about where sperm comes from, how it’s donated, and what you need to consider when choosing a sperm donor.
Quick Sperm Biology Review
Sperm are reproductive cells that are formed in the testicles. Each sperm cell is made up of three parts: the head, the midsection and the tail.
The sperm head contains chromatin, which is the DNA material that makes up chromosomes.
The midsection of the sperm contains mitochondria which provide the energy necessary for the sperm cell to move (the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell!!).
The tail propels the sperm forward, towards an egg for fertilization.
Sperm are suspended in a reproductive fluid called semen.
Don’t worry, there won’t be a quiz.
Queer TTC: How Sperm Donation Works
Well, it is pretty simple. A sperm donor ejaculates sperm-containing semen into a sterilized container.
Next, the sperm is prepared for either intrauterine insemination (IUI) and in-vitro fertilization (IVF) or intracervical insemination (ICI). For IUI and IVF, the sperm is washed to remove seminal fluid and then suspended in a cryopreservative medium. This procedure ensures that semen is not injected into the uterus during insemination. For ICI, the sperm is left unwashed, and is left in the seminal fluid, which will be injected into the vaginal canal along with the sperm.
Queer TTC: How to Get Your Sperm
Most people trying to conceive (TTC) get their sperm from a sperm bank. When it comes to selecting a sperm bank, it can be something of a “buyer beware” situation. Some banks are more reputable than others, and there’s not a lot of industry regulation–which sometimes leads to incomplete screening of donors and sketchy business practices. Depending on where you live, you may be able to choose between registered and unregistered sperm banks. A registered bank is regulated and inspected by a governing body or government health department. And guess what!? I’ve compiled a list of sperm banks where folks in our community had positive, Queer-competent experiences! *But it can’t be guaranteed. Sign up below (at the bottom of the page) to get the list in your inbox!
Sarah Bradley of Co-Fertility puts it very well: “You need to get really, really familiar with how the bank you’re considering using operates: review all their legal policies and consent forms, ask about their record keeping and sibling tracking practices, investigate what kind of medical histories they collect and which medical conditions they test for, and ask around…” A great place to ask around is in the Queer Nest Club! Join here https://queernestclub.com and introduce yourself!
Queer TTC: Known vs. Unknown Sperm Donors
Although most sperm donations are anonymous, there are some people TTC who decide to go with a known donor. This is a HUGE topic to get into, but let’s hit some highlights of the pros and cons of known vs unknown sperm donors:
Possible Advantages of Known Donation:
- You know more about the donor and their background
- A known donor will be less expensive.
- The donor-conceived child can have more information and possibly an ongoing relationship with the donor.
- You may be able to get fresh semen at the right timing which can have good results.
Possible Disadvantages of Known Donation:
- There is potential for future conflict on parenting decisions
- There is an increased risk of legal disputes
- The experience may harm your relationship with the donor
- Some family donor pairs are ethically or medically incompatible
Possible Advantages of Anonymous Donation:
- Less legal risk for the donor and intended parents
- Less risk for future conflict on parenting decisions
Possible Disadvantages of Anonymous Donation:
- Donor-conceived children are often curious about their genetic origins
- Parents and donors may desire a connection in the future
- Anonymity can not be guaranteed with modern genetic technologyLike we said, this is a HUGE topic, and one we are excited to continue uncovering. Check out Instagram live @myqueernest for “Our Donor Experience” on Saturday February 26 at 6pm EST and stay tuned inside the Queer Nest Club! Join here!
